mark weber | ants, again part 3

ANTS, AGAIN, Part 3

So, I went to the exterminator shop
on an old dusty street here in
Albuquerque New Mexico USA
and
just my luck
it’s that crabby old goat
who hates the world
or
is
just merely insane
and
when I ask her about ants
she stares at me with hostility
then drags her butt out of her chair
with such disdain and contempt it scares
the flies buzzing at the window
frantic to get out
she trudges over to the
shelf that has the various chemicals that kill things

then, she looks me over, again
to be sure
that
she hates me
and
the
consensus seems to be that she does

then
commences her
boilerplate rundown on ants and
that she doubts I know what
sort of ant it is that I am up against
I tell her “Little black ants, I saw a picture of them
on the web”
she pauses
the air pregnant with corrosion
and sneers at me
says “Little black ants, huh? That tells me absolutely
nothing except that you don’t know what you are
talking about, sir”

she won’t let me have the canister of powder, I want
to read the ingredients, she holds it back from me

it is the damnedest sales approach
I have ever encountered,
it’s more like a confrontation
she is the single-most disagreeable individual I have come across in some time
she hates me with every fiber in her body, I am a cockroach, damnable

but
I need something to change the minds
of these ants invading my kitchen
so
I bought the canister of powder
after I wrenched it
out of her hands
to make sure there was
nothing carcinogenic
among the ingredients

one can only hope it works

even as it occurred to me that they could grind up this
lady and use her for repellent.

Mark Weber, July 2&3, 2o11