At-Home Ink Blot Test
You ever done the at-home ink blot test?,
he asks.
What’s that?,
I say.
You know, the at home ink blot test:
where each time you take a dump
you wipe in different ways
(different durations, directions, angles etc.)
then look down at the toilet paper smear
and try to say what
it looks like.
You’re fucked up,
I say,
I think we should see other people.
You make us sound like two fags,
he says.
That’s the least of your worries, pal.
Why?,
he asks.
I shake my head
finish my beer
get up
and leave.
Outside
I walk three blocks
north.
To buy paper plates
and plastic utensils
for the party
in my head.